6 Tips to Keep the Romance Alive After Having Kids
Nothing feels more life-altering than having children. The arrival of your young ones can quickly shift things, including your priorities, eating habits, and pretty much everything. Much of your life will revolve around their needs and schedules, and it can be challenging to make time for everything, not to mention the busy work schedule. As a result, many couples struggle to keep the romance alive after having kids.
The marriage starts struggling, and the couple begins falling apart. That’s why many first marriages end in divorce. According to the American Psychological Association, 45% of first marriages end in divorce. Things change over time, which is why there’s a 90-day waiting period for divorce, according to the Colorado Judicial. The truth is, having children shouldn’t shift everything in your marriage and family. As a couple, you can keep your love life alive in a few ways.
1. Have Regular At-Home Date Nights
You may not always have time to go out without the kids like you used to. However, that doesn’t mean you cannot have fun at home. The goal here is to spend quality time together to maintain a strong relationship. Find ways to connect at home. You can create a romantic night date after the kids go to bed. Take a few mugs of coffee together on the back porch, watch a movie, or make dinner on a Saturday night together and enjoy more time together when the children go to bed.
2. Flirt With Each Other
Revisit your dating days when you couldn’t wait to talk to your partner. Bring that habit of sending random pics and playful text messages to let your partner know you’ve been thinking about them. Give sweet compliments, send them links to songs you want them to listen to, or leave love notes where your partner will find them.
3. Get Creative With Your Physical Affection
Lack of affection kills romance. Even the happiest couple could end up in a divorce when there’s no affection. Therefore, focus on those little things that can spice up your relationship, and be more creative towards showing affection to your partner. It’s normal to get tired after a long day of running after kids. However, that shouldn’t be an excuse for not having some fun with your spouse. Every day creates time for physical affection that doesn’t require much energy. Cuddling on the couch for a movie or sneaking a few kisses in the kitchen are all great ways of getting physically affectionate.
4. Schedule Intimacy
Many people are so engrossed in various family duties that they forget intimacy’s integral part in the relationship. Don’t let the daily exhaustion and busy life affect your intimacy. Once in a while, be spontaneous and schedule your intimacy so both of you can look forward to it. That way, you can put in extra effort to lessen your workload and create the right mood for the moment. This includes dressing for the moment, preparing favorite meals, or trying something new.
5. Plan Monthly Dates
You’re so focused on raising your young family that you forget about those crucial dates you used to enjoy before the kids came. As a young and new mother, it’s easy to spend more time indoors nursing your young one. That’s why you need to go out once in a while, even if it’s a few hours. Use these opportunities to connect with each other, explore new cuisines, or sample a new wine. According to Wine Insiders, the average wine glass is 6 oz. Scheduling a monthly date gives both of you something to look forward to and a healthy anticipation in your relationship.
6. Have Less Screen Time When Together
Most of us enjoy a good Netflix binge. However, if all of your time is spent in front of a screen, when will you connect with your spouse? You’re missing out on valuable opportunities that could be used to strengthen your relationship. Take time to put away the phone, computer, and TV and have a conversation with your partner.
Maintaining a solid romantic relationship requires intentionality, proper planning, and a mindset shift. Both parties need to be fully focused on making critical adjustments to create room for romance. Use the above tips to help your relationship thrive.
