Moving in with your significant other is a major milestone in a relationship. You’re taking the next step to building a life together. However, while it’s definitely exciting, you need to understand what you are getting into. Sharing a home with somebody in this way is far more intimate than having a roommate. You need to make sure that you’re both on the same page about the important things. Here are some questions you’ll need to ask your significant other before moving in if you want to avoid trouble later.
What Are Your Future Plans?
When you first move into a home together, you may not be thinking about the future. After all, 5.5 million unmarried couples live together in the U.S. However, it’s important that you and your significant other agree on where your relationship is going.
If one of you thinks this is a roommate situation while the other believes you’re going to get married and have children, you’re going to struggle as time goes on. You need to be honest with each other about this. Having different plans doesn’t necessarily mean you won’t work out, but it does mean that you have to work harder if you’re going to share a life.
Will You Share Finances?
The U.S. Census Bureau states that about 65% of Americans under the age of 35 rent their homes, with bigger growth expected in the rental market. When you rent, you agree to pay a certain amount of money each month for your home. You’re both responsible for the finances of your home, but there are different ways to go about managing them. Will you merge your finances together or will you keep them separated? Either approach can be very successful, but you both need to agree on it.
Consider your current income, potential future income, and financial habits as you make your decision. You’ll want to choose something that allows you both to feel comfortable while also getting your bills paid.
What Are Your Cleanliness Needs?
You’re both going to be living in this space, so you need to figure out how to manage cleaning it. If your home is too cluttered, you may feel like you can’t get comfortable in it. Clutter can be frustrating, and it’s important to keep in mind that 80% of clutter is due to disorganization, not space issues.
Sometimes one partner is more cluttered than the other, or one partner might want the house to be completely clean at all times while the other can live with a bit of clutter. These kinds of fights can destroy relationships, so you want to discuss it from the start. You’ll need to compromise, especially if your clutter tolerances don’t line up perfectly.
What Are Your Schedules?
Just because you’re in a relationship does not mean you follow the same schedules all the time. If you have different work schedules and hobbies, then you’ll be in and out of the house at different times. While this can be a good thing, it can also cause friction. One of you might be frustrated at a lack of time together, or one of you may wake up the other late at night or early in the morning.
Make sure that you’re both aware of each other’s schedules before you move in together. This will prevent any unexpected absences or annoyances at odd hours from impacting your bond.
Moving into a new home together for the first time can be an exciting experience. However, it can also be very difficult to get settled in together. If you’re about to move in with your significant other, take these questions and go over your answers together.